New Earth

Lily grabbed her husband's hand and led him out of the ship.

Cyril stumbled out of the ship with Lily, "Earth, eh? A good place to start."

Lily sighed contently, "What's that smell? It's great!"

"Pollution?" Cyril ventured before taking a sniff. "Oh no, smells like apples. We're in an orchard of apples." Cyril said as he looked around. No, he resolved to himself, this was NOT a doctor who episode.

Lily laugbed, "Can I just say, dying, I hated it. Is that a hospital? N-nope. That's a crackden. Yay!"

"Dying is never pleasant," Cyril agreed, taking an apple from the tree and eating it. "So, choose a direction."

Lily was about to steal the apple when she remembered the movie she had watched humans watch from the death dimension, "Vegas baby," she said in an Austin Powers' inpression.

"How do yo- never mind." Cyril spun around and got his bearings. "That way? Yeah, that way." Cyril touched Lily and transported them to the middle of a nuclear weapons testing grounds. "Woops, overshot it a bit." He teleported them again and they were in Vegas. Baby.

Lily grinned, "So what is Vegas, baby?"

"Cesspool of crime and gambling and flagrant coquetry," Cyril answered, looking around at all the lights. "It gets much worse at night. How did you even know about this place?"

"Movies," she said, turning day to night immediately. "When does it get more fun? It's night!" The neon lights flickered on as the various staff of the business realized that it was suddenly night. Immediately, hustlers and pimps and hoes and ravenous priests spilled out into the streets.

"Movies?" Cyril echoed. Had she not only been here for, like, a day? A group of excited, topless women drove by, holding soft drinks in the and shrieking in excitement. "Right about now I suppose."

"I feel the need to tell those young women they don't need to objectify themselves." She chased after them. "I WANT TO HELP YOU FEEL EMPOWERED THROUGH ANOTHER OUTLET."

"Shuddup ya new age hippie!" Some guy who was thoroughly enjoying these women shouted at Lily.

"Oh boy..." Cyril muttered.

"How dare you," she said, primed to slap the pervert

"Get over it!" The man just walked away to go partake in some Las Vegas behavior. Probably getting married to someone via Elvis impersonator. That's what happens in Vegas, right?

Lily felt dirty just walking around, "Cyril, how do you know if you got "da herps'?"

"What? I don't... I don't even think we can contract that." Cyril wondered if they could. "Where the hell are you getting all this? You've only been in this universe for like a day."

"I... 'MTV'?" Lily coughed. "Oh, gods. That sounded like AIDS."

"No, dear, you don't-" Cyril started laughing.

Lily blinked, "Whaat?"

"Those are only transmitted sexually Lily," Cyril laughed, 'We can't even get these human diseases to begin with!"

"Oh. Gross." She sighed, "Where to next?"

"How do the Himalayas sound? Beautiful mountain range, or so I'm told." Cyril rubbed his chin, "Or New York if we're sticking to the theme of cities."

"Oh, a New York!" She grinned, "We'd better go before it turns into an old York!"